Grace

Photography | Jessica Rediker

I remember when it was just her and I on mat leave. When I had one perfect little baby. I remember watching her sleep during the day. Taking her to the mall, her sitting in the stroller, staring up at me, watching my every move. I forget sometimes that I won't get those moments back. I fear that I won't remember them one day. 

I remember thinking that she is just so sweet and innocent, I don't want to ever hurt her. And now, here we are. I find myself losing my patience and thinking the worst. There are moments when she just wants to spend time with me, and I just want my space...and I feel guilty for that. 

But every day is a chance to start again. We are not defined by our mistakes or missed opportunities. There are things that I wish I could have done differently, or that I could take back. I'm not perfect, but there is grace. It is there with me in my coming and going...everyday. When I sleep and when I wake. My past is for yesterday and my present shapes the future. Today, I choose grace.